Smile: The Inspection
by lunartick
Summary: Oneshot. If Tetsu's a puppy, exactly what breed is he? The end of the Shinsengumi is coming because of a letter? What is going on? Well, read to find out! Nonyaoi.


Hey, hey, hey! I'm back again with another instalment of the Smile series! Just a rather lame idea I had once in the middle of the night. This fic is inspired by the first book of the second series of Peacemaker and a rather weird question that goes along the lines of, "If Tetsu is a puppy then what breed is he?" Ha ha…

Hmm… personally I didn't find this fic as funny as some of my previous Smile instalments, but I guess I can live with it. It's just a weird idea that I had to write down, and since I wrote it down, I might as well upload it. Ha ha… forgive me…

Anyway, PMK does not belong to me, but you can still leave a review for this story!

LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL

**Smile: The Inspection**

Tetsu gritted his teeth as he touched the painful wound in his arm. The events of five minutes ago flashed through his mind again.

_Who's that person walking around the dojo? Ah… he's heading for Hijikata's room? Must listen to what is being said because I have the curiosity of a cat… AHH! Someone just threw daggers at me! _

_The door opens, and I gaze into the eyes of a man with skin as white as snow and a very bad hair day. _

_"What's the matter?" _

_"Nothing… it's just a puppy." _

Puppy!

Puppy!

Puppy!

That man called him a puppy!

And suddenly everything made sense.

Tears formed in Tetsu's eyes as he trailed miserably beside Tatsu.

"What's the matter?" Tatsu asked concernedly. "Do the wounds still hurt? That is your fault, you know, for sneaking about like that and eavesdropping on your superior…"

"It's not that," Tetsu interrupted as the tears started to flow freely. "It's… it's _you_, Tatsu-nii!"

"Me?" Tatsu protested, surprised. "What about _me_?"

Unable to contain the surge of emotions that rushed through his veins, Tetsu leaped forward with a loud sob and threw his arms around Tatsu's waist. "Tatsu-nii!" he wailed. "Why didn't you ever tell me?"

Tatsu stared blankly at his little brother. "Tell you what?" he asked nervously.

"You could have told me!" Tetsu brawled. "You could have told me! I would have been okay with it!"

"Okay with what?"

"That I'm… that I'm a _puppy_!"

"Puppy?" Tatsu gripped his head in a show of agony. "What are you talking about, Tetsu?"

"That spiky hair bastard called me a puppy!" Tetsu wailed. "And then it all made sense! The way I _doggedly _do what people in authority don't want me to do… the way I _snarl_ and _growl_ and _bark_ when I'm angry… and even my _size_! And my _hair_… no not hair… _fur_!"

Tatsu stared into the night sky as he patted his brother on the back instinctively "Tetsu…" he began slowly, "I don't think I'm quite sure I know what you're talking about…"

Tetsu let go of his brother and wiped his eyes quickly. "It's ok, you know," he said bravely. "I understand you were trying to protect me…"

"Protect you?" Briefly Tatsu wondered if Tetsu had bumped his head one too many times.

"Could you just… just answer one last question?"

"Question?"

Tetsu took a deep, quavering breath. "So… am I a chow-chow or a cocker spaniel?"

LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL

Oblivious to the commotion going out on the corridor, Hijikata sighed as he wrestled with the piles of paper on his table. Not to get things wrong; he _loved_ those piles of papers, _adored_ them in fact, because they represented good hard work and progress. However, sometimes, there was _just_ a little too much good hard work and progress… and accidents happen. Usually, these accidents solve themselves quite rapidly, because piles of paper on the table have a tendency to vanish. On the other hand, they also have a tendency to reappear as piles of paper on the _floor_, which creates a whole different set of problems.

Currently, however, the problem had reappeared not in the form of piles of paper on the _floor_, but piles of paper on _Yamazaki Susumu_. This problem, of course, required a different set of solutions and a different set of protocol to adhere to. The number one on both lists, Hijikata decided, necessitated him to call out, "Are you ok, Yamazaki?"

A slim pale hand broke through the mountainous pile of paper and started to wave around frantically. Taking the cue, Hijikata hurried forward and grasped the offered appendage. "Yamazaki?"

"I'm fine," came the faint, highly muffled reply, "but I believe I would require some assistance in my current… endeavor to escape this… situation."

"Ah…" Hijikata started to tug on the hand, but it seemed the shinobi was weighed down well and truly by paperwork. Abandoning the hand, the demon vice-commander chose instead to push away the paper (hopefully, _off_ Susumu, and not _on to_ Susumu, given he wasn't sure exactly where the shinobi was). "I'm coming, Yamazaki," he said helpfully.

"Many thanks indeed," the shinobi replied, "but if it is not too much trouble, I would request that you hurry up, sir, because there is something green and slimy down here that is _attacking me_!" Hijikata winced as the pitch of the shinobi's voice raised a good two octaves on the last two words.

"Eh… I'm coming!" Courageously, Hijikata started to swipe even harder at the confounded paperwork that was robbing the Shinsengumi of their Watcher and delaying the Watcher from continuing his report on the Choshu rebel movement. "Are you ok, Yamazaki?"

On the bad side, the pile of paper remained disconcertingly silent (and piled-up). On the good side, more of Susumu's arm was visible. Briefly, Hijikata wondered how Susumu could pass off so well as a woman when he had arms that were so evidently male.

The next two seconds were spent secretly confessing a newfound respect for the wonders of make-up and shaving.

Suddenly, there was a deep, earthly rumbling from the bowels of the pile, and (since the words 'rumbling' and 'bowels' in the same sentence usually do not bode well) Hijikata found it necessary to scramble back behind the table for the sake of his own safety. With a defiant roar (which rose up to a rather feminine shriek), Yamazaki Susumu erupted from the pile, swatting at something that was clinging to the front of his yukata.

Before Hijikata could get a good look at what it was however, it was thrown out of the room and riddled with kunai by a rather irate shinobi.

The rather awkward silence that always follows a situation where a man loses his cool and screams was broken when Hijikata muttered, "You ok?"

"Yes, sir," Susumu replied calmly, kneeling down again before the table.

"Ah… very well then," Hijikata said, "you may continue your report."

"Yes sir, but before that, I believe it would be in the best interests of the Shinsengumi for you to look at this, sir." From the yukata, a piece of paper was produced. "I noticed it when I was trapped beneath the… pile, sir."

In awe of the shinobi's ability to be trapped, locate a piece of paper that affects the interests of the Shinsengumi and battle a green slimy thing at the same time with only one arm, Hijikata took the offered piece of paperwork. "What is it?"

"I believe sir, that it is a letter for you."

"A letter?" Hijikata raised the paper and ran his eyes down the lines carefully. Just as his eyes reached the last full-stop, Hijikata uttered a tragic gasp and raised his eyes to meet the shinobi's. "This is…"

"Yes, it is, sir."

With a low groan, Hijikata crumpled up the paper and threw it vengefully into the corner of the room. "Yamazaki," he rasped, "alas, the days of tragedy have come… it is… the second Friday of the month is tomorrow, isn't it?"

"Indeed sir."

"We are doomed, you know?"

"Shall I go wake the men, sir?"

"Of course!" Hijikata straightened his back and scowled. "If we're going to go down then the whole of the Shinsengumi might as well come down with us."

LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL

In the world of dancing pieces of furniture and houses made of candy, the land was changing. Flying pigs grew horns and produced pitchforks while beautiful princesses turned old and warty, and started wearing pointed, conical hats.

These made one Okita Souji very amused.

Cute little flying pigs were nice but it was also pleasant and highly therapeutic to throw stones at the devil flying pigs. And beautiful princesses were only good at swooning; those with the warts were good at swooning _and_ throwing evil magic spells at him at the same time, and were thus far more interesting. Okita discovered they actually _bounced_ when you threw them off cliffs.

Just as he was watching one fall off the cliff however, something chose to shake him out of the world of experimentation and back into the world of reality. Lying in the dark, Okita stared sleepily up into the ceiling and wondered what it was.

Well… the distant voice yelling, "Emergency! Emergency! This is not a drill! All captains to the dojo immediately!" was a strong contender.

Sleepy, but highly curious, Okita crawled out of bed and adjusted his yukata immediately. Carefully, he slid his sword into the belt and opened the door. "What is it?" he called to the men that were now thundering past his room.

"Ah… Souji!"

"Nagakura-san?"

The short red-head skidded to a stop. "Hijikata-san is calling an emergency meeting in the dojo for all captains!" Shinpachi informed breathlessly. "Hurry! He said the last one there has to commit seppuku."

"Ah… in that case, wouldn't it be better if _I_ was the last one there?" Okita teased. "Since Hijikata-san would never kill me?"

"Yeah, but 'seppuku' generally means killing yourself so Hijikata-san will probably have less of a trouble… whatever, just hurry!" Okita pouted then giggled as Shinpachi grabbed his wrist roughly and dragged him into the throng of panicked men.

In the depths of Okita's mind, watching the men scramble and scream in fear of a man who was not really all that scary was almost as amusing as burning the warty, ugly princesses alive.

LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL

As it turned out, the last one to arrive at the dojo was one Commander Kondou. Fortunately for him, all he received was a terrible glare courtesy of one demon vice-commander before he was allowed to take the seat before the men.

"Ne, Toshi," Kondou asked seriously, "why did you wake us up in the middle of the night? It sounds bad; Yamazaki-san practically tore my door off its hinges."

Hijikata closed his eyes as if in deep thought. Extracting his pipe from his lips, he exhaled smoke in a deep sigh.

"Hijikata-san?" Okita asked worriedly.

Ignoring his friend, Hijikata raised his eyes to address the audience. "Men," he said solemnly, "when you joined the Shinsengumi, you swore an oath to follow the Shinsengumi to whatever end. And now, the end is near, my bro… subordinates, very near."

Startled gasps escaped parted lips as the captains exchanged shocked, worried looks. What had occurred when they were asleep? Had the Choshu overrun the palace while they rested? Was the emperor assassinated while they slumbered? Was the Shinsengumi now the… rebels?

"Toshi!" Kondou cried, shocked. "How could you say that? Even if it is true, you should keep it a secret, if only for the sake of the morale of the troops…" He trailed off when ten pairs of eyes fixed on him accusingly. "Not that we keep much from the troops…" he ended lamely.

"Ne, Hijikata-san," Okita queried, choosing to ignore the stuttering Commander, "what do you mean? What has happened?"

In reply, Hijikata extracted a piece of paper from the depths of his sleeve. "_This_ has happened," he said shortly. "Yamazaki found it earlier amidst the pile of paper in my room. If only it had been located earlier… but no, this is not the time for regrets."

Curiously, Kondou extracted it from Hijikata's hands and started to read out loud. "Greetings, Men of the Shinsengumi! On the second Friday of the month, my daughter, Mikawa Aoi and I, Mikawa Kanto will make a short visit over to visit your headquarters. We look forward to this occasion. Potentially your largest non-government patron; Mikawa Kanto."

There was a long silence as the captains of the Shinsengumi tried to understand how this letter foretold the apocalypse and the death of many.

"But isn't this good news?" Heisuke voiced timidly. "I mean… if there's a woman involved, things should go even more smoothly for Hijikata-san, right?"

"Unless…" Sano whispered, "this Mikawa woman has already _met_ Hijikata-san before… then things could get really ugly…"

"Ne, Toshi…" Kondou began.

"There's a little bit left," Hijikata interrupted.

"Oh… eh… let me see… hmm… ah… _oh no._"

"Oh no is definitely right."

"What is it?" Okita asked, startled by the pallor that had flooded Kondou's normally tanned face.

Kondou swallowed hard and wiped perspiration off his nose. "It reads," he said weakly, "PS: We look forward to meeting the cute little page Hijikata-san has acquired."

And the captains spent the next two minutes picturing a very, very messy end to the Shinsengumi.

LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL

Tatsu stared helplessly at the two figures advancing towards him. "Y… Yamazaki-san, Okita-san," he stammered, "how… how can I help you?" He 'eeped' softly as his back hit the door of the cupboard.

"We need to speak with Tetsu-kun _now_," Okita said firmly.

"B… b… but Tetsu's sleeping," Tatsu stuttered, holding the door to the cupboard shut, "a growing boy like him… needs plenty of rest, calcium, protein, vitamins and minerals… not good to wake him up now…"

"I don't see how that can matter," Susumu replied calmly, "I seem to recall seeing him sneaking around just a while ago."

"But… but he's finally gotten to sleep…" Tatsu pleaded desperately, "O… Okita-san! Surely this can wait till tomorrow…"

"Unfortunately, no," Okita said unsmilingly, "he has to wake up now. This is a matter of life and death, Tatsu-kun. You wouldn't want us all to commit seppuku now, would you?"

"Of course not!" Tatsu cried. "But… but… it's really not a good idea to eh… meet Tetsu… now."

"It would be a worse idea _not_ to meet Tetsu now," Okita said patiently, trying to pry the handle of the door from Tatsu's hands, "please, Tatsu, you must…" He paused as the sound of shifting came from inside the cupboard. "Tetsu-kun?"

"No!" Tatsu screamed, hanging on to the door. "Please, Okita-san! Don't!"

"Tatsu-kun!" Okita said coldly. "Tomorrow, a very important patron will be coming specially to meet Tetsu-kun. Incidentally, Tetsu-kun is a page who, while adorable and lovable, is totally incapable of manners, etiquette and tea-serving. He has to learn all this immediately, or we will all be carrying out seppuku tomorrow!"

Tatsu groaned and paled even further. "No… of all days…" he mumbled deliriously.

"Yamazaki-san… if you please…"

"Understood." With more effort than he appeared to take, Yamazaki latched onto Tatsu and forcefully pulled him away from the cupboard.

"No!" Tatsu screamed, kicking and trashing in vain. The scream evolved into a non-verbal one when the shinobi decided he had had enough, and applied pressure on a very fragile area of the body.

"My apologies," Okita said sincerely as he grabbed the cupboard door and pulled it open. "Tetsu-kun?"

The tiny figure beneath the covers shifted then the page sat up, blinking and rubbing his eyes.

Okita smiled indulgently. Damn, he had such a soft spot for little children! "Ne, Tetsu-kun," he cooed, "I'm so sorry for interrupting your sleep, but something very important has come up, and it is time for you to show the Shinsengumi what you can do!"

Tetsu looked up excitedly, brown eyes meeting violet. A huge grin of anticipation spread across his face as he clapped his hands enthusiastically.

Then he scratched his ear with his foot.

Startled, Okita took a swift step backwards. "T… Tetsu-kun?" he questioned. "Are you… are you alright?"

Tetsu grinned and replied, "Woof."

LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL

"HE, WHAT?"

Tatsu wailed incomprehensively and curled up into a defensive ball around his little brother. "I'm so sorry, Hijikata-san!" he brawled. "Just don't do anything too drastic to Tetsu, please!"

"HE WHAT?" Hijikata roared again then turned on the first captain. "Tell me I didn't hear what I just heard."

"Ok, you didn't hear what you just heard."

Hijikata groaned. "You have got to be kidding me," he (almost) pleaded.

"I'm sorry," Tatsu pleaded back, "Tetsu he… someone called him a 'puppy', and now he thinks he's a chow-chow!"

"Well," Okita said, looking Tetsu up and down critically, "there is a rather striking resemblance…"

"Not only that," Tatsu went on, the words tumbling out now that he had someone to complain to, "he feels that he has not done his species justice by living as a 'human', and thus he has made a stupid oath to live the rest of his life as a dog…" Wailing, he clutched his obstinately panting little brother and started begging his long-dead family for forgiveness.

Hijikata scowled and turned on the puppy. "Stop this nonsense now," he growled, "if you want to be a dog, fine, but do it _after_ the patron leaves tomorrow."

"Woof," Tetsu replied stubbornly.

"Ichimura!" Hijikata roared, shooting to his feet.

"Woof!" Tetsu shot back, and tried to attach his teeth to the back of Hijikata's calf. Fortunately for the demon vice-commander, Okita was there to calm the irate canine page down with a bone.

"Well, what are we going to do now?" Shinpachi asked nervously. "We can't possibly introduce the patron to Tetsu the Chow-Chow!"

"Don't be silly!" Hijikata screamed. "Of course we can't! Look at him! He's a _dog_!" Everyone turned to stare at Tetsu, who was busy gnawing at the edge of the bone.

Hijiikata growled.

Tetsu growled back.

Hijikata snarled.

Tetsu snarled back.

Hijikata got tired and tried to kick Tetsu.

Tetsu got scared and tried to hide behind Okita.

"Wait," Okita pleaded, dodging to avoid the foot that was now flying towards him, "let's all think things over nice and easy… ow! Hijikata-san!"

"That was for stealing my haiku book yesterday."

Okita frowned adorably and rubbed his bruised ribs. "That was cruel," he announced.

"Whatever."

Shinpachi, Sano and Heisuke exchanged looks before unanimously deciding that it was important to break up the fight before Okita did some serious damage to one Hijikata Toshizou. A whispered discussion broke out as the three tried to reach a conclusion on who to sacrifice.

Unfortunately for Shinpachi, he was the smallest, and thus the easiest to fling into the middle of the glaring pair.

Shrieking and cringing, Shinpachi pried open his eye-lids, only to see that was now within centimeters of Hijikata's foot. "Hijikata-san…" he croaked, "shouldn't we be… discussing… Tetsu?" His voice trailed off into a whimper as he realised both glares were now directed at him.

"What? Dissecting Tetsu?" Hijikata asked, a spark of interest in his eyes.

"I believe he said, '_discussing_ Tetsu', Hijikata-san," Okita said coldly.

"Eep!" Shinpachi squeaked, and curled up into a ball. "S… Souji… Hijikata-san…"

Hijikata and Okita exchanged one more glare before turning back to the source of all their problems (and tea-stains).

"Woof," Tetsu said stubbornly.

"Shut up," Hijikata snapped. "Men, what are we supposed to do about this beast? Dawn is just two hours away!"

"This might just very well be a blessing," Heisuke mused, "I mean… because now, we definitely cannot allow Tetsu to meet the patron, which is much better than him meeting the patron and spilling tea all over him."

"But the patron basically just announced that he _will_ meet Tetsu," Shinpachi protested. "Tetsu has to be there, by hook or by crook."

"Yeah… but…"

"Crook."

Everyone turned and stared. Susumu, suddenly finding himself the source of everyone's attention fidgeted nervously.

"What did you say?" Hijikata demanded.

"Crook," Susumu replied blandly. "I meant… I think I have a solution."

"Alright…"

"But time is of the essence and I need some material…"

"What?"

Susumu took a deep breath and stared at the ceiling board contemplatively. The captains and commanders leaned closer, staring earnestly (and desperately) at the emotionless face.

"I need…"

"Yes?"

"I need a chow-chow."

"Chow-chow?"

"Preferably…"

"Preferably?"

"A rather hairy chow-chow."

LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL

Mikawa Kanto stepped out of the sedan, stretched and smiled into the brilliant sunshine. Today, he was going to check up on his… investment. If things went right, his business would be free from taxes for the rest of his life. If things went even better, (he sneaked a glance at his daughter) he might just be able to find his daughter a husband.

"Father…"

"Yes, Aoi?"

"Um… are we meeting… meeting… H… H… H… H…"

"Hijikata Toshizou?"

"Hai!"

"Yes, dear."

Mikawa Aoi clutched her furiously blushing cheeks and smiled giddily. "Let's go."

"Ok…"

Together, they stepped regally into the premises, smiling and nodding at the bowing men.

"Ah… Mikawa-san."

Mikawa and Aoi gazed into the opened door where the voice came from. The owner of the voice (by default, since he was the only one in the room) was a tall, dark and very handsome man. A strong, muscular hand extracted a pipe from a mouth and laid it on the table. Then a charming smile was shot across the room and right into Aoi's eyes.

"Greetings," Mikawa said hurriedly as Aoi started making short gasping sounds. "I am Mikawa Kanto, and this is my daughter, Aoi. You must be…"

"Hijikata Toshizou," the man replied, bowing deeply. "This is indeed a great honour, Mikawa-san, and I must say, you have the loveliest daughter."

"You exaggerate, surely," Mikawa replied, hurriedly ushering his daughter to her seat before she fainted.

"Not at all," Hijikata replied and proceeded to give his best polite laugh. Mikawa joined in while Aoi placed one hand on her rather ample bosom and continued making short gasping noises.

"Ah… it is indeed a great pleasure to meet you," Mikawa went on. "You are indeed quite different from what your reputation as a 'demon' portrays you as."

Hijikata tried the polite laugh again and said, "Oh, now you are being too kind." Briefly, he considered shooting his best seductive gaze at Aoi, but changed his mind when a visual inspection of her vital signs suggested she was on the verge of passing out – permanently.

"I must say though," Mikawa confessed, "I am looking forward to meeting this page of yours. I have heard so many contradictory rumours about him, that he has piqued my curiosity."

"Oh, is that so?"

"Oh yes. I've heard rumours that he is nothing more than a brash little ignorant kid, but the ladies down at Shimabara tell me he is just the cutest thing they have ever met."

Hijikata kept the smile on his face. "How odd," he managed to say, "the 'cutest thing', you say? Ah ha ha…"

"So, Hijikata-san! Where is this little page of yours?"

"Ah…"

As if on cue, footsteps came from outside the room coupled with the clatter of tea-cups against a tray.

Immediately, all three faces turned to stare at the door. Slowly, the door slid opened to reveal a figure kneeling outside with a tray of tea and cakes.

Aoi made a loud gasping noise and her bosom started heave even harder.

Pale slender fingers gracefully slid the tray towards them, coupled with the smooth movement of knees that carried the figure forward. A beautiful, almost feminine face smiled up at them from under a shock of spiked red hair. With an almost cat-like flow, the slim body bowed and a breathy, deep voice murmured, "My apologies for this interruption. I have brought tea and cakes."

Hijikata smiled pleasantly. "Ah, Ichimura-kun," he called, "come here and introduce yourself to our guests, Mikawa-san and the lovely Aoi-san."

The page bowed deeply again. "Greetings, Mikawa-san and Aoi-san," he said, a sweet, almost shy smile gracing his rose-bud lips, "I am Ichimura Tetsunoke. It is a pleasure to meet you."

Mikawa grinned widely. "Ah! It is a pleasure to meet you too, Ichimura-kun!" he greeted cheerfully. "I can see why the ladies at Shimabara think that you are the cutest thing ever! What a handsome lad you are!"

"That is very kind of you," the handsome lad in question replied, "tea, Aoi-san?"

"Y… y… y… y…"

"Yes?"

"Y… yes…"

The man smiled and placed the cup in front of her. "And would you like some dessert?"

"Y… y… y…"

"Yes?"

"Y… y… yes…"

"Here you go." The man straightened up with a smile. "Please enjoy the refreshments, my lady"

"Refreshments?" Aoi squeaked.

Again, the shy smile lit up the stunning face. "The cakes are freshly baked just for you, my lady, and the tea has been brewed from the finest of green teas."

"Fresh…"

"Yes, my lady. Is it to your liking?"

The page paused for an answer. However, the only answer he got was a soft thud, much like the sound a body makes when it hits tatami.

LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL

Hijikata exhaled a cloud of smoke lazily and growled. "I need more sleep," he grumbled, "all this trouble just to placate that ass of a patron. Damn…"

"Yes, indeed, Hijikata-san," the page said politely then reached up and removed his hair. "This wig is undeniably uncomfortable to wear."

There was the sound of muffled giggling then the inner door of Hijikata's room opened and Okita skipped into the room, laughing merrily.

"What's so funny?" Hijikata demanded grouchily.

"You, of course," Okita replied candidly, "and Yamazaki-san. The way that lady fainted…" The laughter came again, and Okita doubled over, almost suffocating himself in his attempt to stop laughing.

"Not funny," Hijikata growled as Susumu did a quick trot back to his room to get rid of the fake eyebrows (which were also, rather uncomfortable as well).

"But it is," Okita replied from his position on the floor.

"Whatever," Hijikata grumbled. "Where's that miserable page anyway?"

Okita grinned and gestured to the garden. A quick peek showed one Tetsunosuke playing tag with a drastically shaved chow-chow. Tatsu stood nearby looking just about ready to commit seppuku.

"Souji," Hijikata growled. "I entrust you with the task of beating some sense into that idiot's head."

"Yes sir."

"Now get lost so I can get some sleep."

"Ok."

Once Okita was gone, Hijikata heaved his futon out the cupboard with a sigh and lay down. His eyes half-closed and he gave a slight smile of satisfaction. Nothing felt better than a good night's worth of work. Of course, he would have to commend Yamazaki for his excellent performance today… and the Comedian Trio for locating a chow-chow… and… but that could all wait… right now, he needed some sleep.

As he fell asleep, he could have sworn he saw Okita stalking past his bedroom and heading towards the garden with a bokken in his hands, but he couldn't be bothered. After all, who was Okita going to beat so early in the day?

LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL

"Oh, Tetsu-kun?"

"Woof?"

"Would you be so nice as to come here for a while?"

"Woof?"

"Oh, don't worry about your new friend. Just come here for a while, I've got something to show you by orders of Hijikata-san."

"Woof?"

LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL

Love it, hate it, or just can't be bothered with it? Tell me about it!

For those who are bored with my one-shots, I am thinking of doing a multi-chaptered story for PMK.

Can anyone tell me if writing a story in diary format is against Fanfiction rules? Thanks!


End file.
